Skip to main content

Flying Pigeon: Who knew it would feel this good

So today has been a bit different. Another Thursday, but Olive was a sheep at her nursery's nativity. She was emotional after her amazing performance, so she obviously wanted to come home and find Junie-Bugs and Nanny. She came home and then I went to yoga. 

This week, I've still been feeling overwhelmed myself. I kind of wish I could cry in the middle of a stage after an amazing performance and be rescued by a cuddly fluffy jumper and be told it was ok. But I'm the fluffy jumper and I have to be the guardian angel to my crying sheep.

When life gets too much, I've been starting to get more frustrated than usual. Actually, I think it's just been there since children. I think it's my super protective mode. Going to yoga, eating well, and drinking less wine is what I've decided to focus on. I'm not sure I've reduced my grape intake yet, but I've just finished a yoga class - and my goodness, I forgot how good flying pigeon felt. Or attempting to do a flying pigeon I should add. 

No one really talks about Mum Rage. It's horrible. It feels like a hot mist, and - in the moment - I tend to get so frustrated with all the little things. Everything annoys me and I just want to escape. It definitely doesn't feel like myself. 

So, I've decided that I need more yoga. Let's see if that helps for a bit. I've been reading a lot; just finished the Girl with a Pearl Earring and I need to write up my review of that in my little notebook. I also think it's this time of year for feeling frazzled. I've never looked forward to a New Year so much in that I look forward to that feeling of being refreshed. Now, it's a time when there is so much to do and such little time. Why do we have so much to do for Christmas? It's just one day. It all feels too much for me. 

Thankfully, we can escape. This time next week, we'll be getting ready for our trip to Wales and we'll be packing up house and home to spend 5 quality days together in pure countryside before Christmas begins. 

Earlier, before my yoga class, I had an amazing phone call that may end up resulting in an amazing opportunity to get myself back into the world of education. I'm ecstatic about it; so much so that I cried putting the washing out. I love it when opportunities come your way when you really need them. It feels like a lifeboat sent out to save me. I've been feeling at a crossroads for a while; well, not a crossroads, more of a winding road with no real destination...or feeling like I'm in a constant state of maternity leave limbo.

But this idea of a winding road: isn't that what's life all about? Trying to enjoy the twists and turns without knowing the destination. Learning to be happy through the rain and all that. I feel like I'm constantly improving myself and my family's future by creating new pathways to brighten up our journey of life. 

And that's what I promise to Oscar, that no matter how much Mum Rage I have, I will learn to accept that further down the path, there will be opportunities that arise to bring me out of the mist and into the sunshine. 

That's why humans should have faith in each other to bear with them while they go through their own journey and I'm learning the true meaning of love from knowing that someone is willing to stick with me through my own strange little path called life.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Through the bleak grows hope: January 2025

One of my friends said to me last week that January is for organising. She's a vegetable gardener. More will follow about this later, but currently, I'm upstairs in our bedroom after a very average sleep.  --- I managed the above three sentences before I was interrupted. It's now very common with three little lives that come bursting in on me in the morning. We had to get ready for the school run so off I went to convince them to stand still for more than a few minutes just to get them changed. I rudely interrupted their game of MumandDad. They really have the sweetest games. But this post isn't about 3-4 year old games. As always, I never know where this writing will take me but I have a vague idea and I know that I need to write. So I write.  I'll crack straight on with this first post since March 2024...my mission is to use this blog to write every month. I have showered and dried my hair. Alone. A luxury in this Mum world I'm currently in. It isn't just ...
Post a Comment
Read more

Another New Chapter: Full of surprises...

I'm writing this when I should be hanging the washing out. Logging on has made me realise that I haven't written since last year. It was on a book about the independent sector of education. I have had a lot of eye opening and life changing moments since that last post.  Firstly, we are expecting our third baby...it still seems surreal to be writing that. I feel so lucky and overwhelmed with how busy our house will be and how much love can be in one home. A total surprise and I now have to navigate another fork in the road of my teaching career. Sometimes, life takes over and you just have to surrender to the family. It reminds me to slow down: how I'm here to love them, our children, and not my job. Yes, we have the most ginormous toddler tantrums with our middle one, but the cuddles she can give are just phenomenal. I wish I could cuddle her at this age forever. Our eldest is getting ready for school in September and is nearly 5. She is just so grown up. I wish I could rem...
Post a Comment
Read more

First, Second, and Third Summer Reads, 2019: Donoghue, Westover, Rooney

Here marks the first three books of my summer reads 2019. The reviews seem to get longer and longer the further into the summer I go (maybe my brain starts to be more productive after being zapped of any energy with the busy GCSE preparations). So, firstly, a parent of an influential, talented pupil suggested the following novel to me last year during Parents' Evening. The following week, I gave the book to her daughter as a present and I've finally got the time to read it. This young lady in particular is an amazing writer and I hope she continues to read, write, and love the cathartic sense of writing. 1. Room by Emma Donoghue A few days in to summer holidays and the first read was already finished. I clearly wanted to indulge into a non set text novel. I whizzed through in a few days whilst I recovered from a busy summer term. I was impressed with the narrative voice and the storyline is shocking. At the beginning, it was brilliantly written from a young boy whose ...
1 comment
Read more